Film 20/52: Treasure of the Four Crowns 3-D (1983)

I was excited that we were able to screen Treasure of the Four Crowns as our second 3D feature of the series. To be fair, the version of the film that we've had in the Slaughtered Lamb Cinema library for years is a pan and scan DVD, so the recent upgrade to widescreen and 3D made this a timely addition. And whereas A*P*E was a 3D knock off of the 1976 King Kong remake, Treasure of the Four Crowns serves up a low-rent 3D Raiders of the Lost Ark. 

While there are arguably some over-the-top visual effects that might hold up under 2D viewing, let's put our cards on the table and clarify that the only way you should invest any time with this movie is in its 3D version. I can't imagine that the included red/blue anaglyph 3D version included on the disc is worth watching, but if you have a Blu Ray 3D setup, you can experience film in the most favorable means possible. And this isn't a subtle, look at the cool depth of the shots 3D effort (though there are a few of those). No, this is a 'poke-you-in-the-eye' 3D feature, and you can rest assured that almost every one of those shots is repeated 3x. Not shot poking you three times, mind you, but shot once and cut in three times in a row! Snakes, arrows, swords, pretty much every object imaginable leaps out from the screen, right between your eyes. Roger Ebert was kind enough to delineate them in his review:

Here is my rough checklist of things thrown at the audience in Treasure of the Four Crowns: knives, spears, darts, bones, jeweled daggers, balls of fire, laser beams, boulders, ropes, attack dogs, bats, shards of stained glass, a set of dishes, a large kettle, a stove, a corpse, a python snake, an empty glove, birds (both real and artificial), arrows, unidentifiable glowing objects shot from guns, keys, letter openers, several human heads, skeletons, large sections of an exploding castle, one bottle of booze and assorted spoons.

The movie itself is pretty forgettable outside of the 3D, though those who stick with it are rewarded with some pretty crazy visual effects in the climax, including spinning heads and a low-rent (albeit charming) take-down of the big baddie inspired by the fate of the Nazis at the end of Raiders. Tony Anthony plays Indiana J.T. Striker, and also served as the producer for this and a prior 3D effort (Comin' At Ya! — which I had the pleasure of watching an anaglyph 3D version of, cardboard glasses and all, on a portable DVD player in the back row of an Southwest flight with Steffan Schulz several decades ago, much to the amusement of the flight crew). This was Anthony's last acting role, but I give him credit for carrying the 20-minute opening sequence, without any dialog! He discusses his role in the 80s 3D boom, in an interview on the Kino disc.

Is this a good movie? Meaning, would I suggest watching it in 2D? The answer is no. I seem to recall that some of the best bits are featured in one of the Cannon Films documentaries, as they were somewhat familiar. So that's probably your best bet if 3D is not an option. However, given the opportunity to experience it under ideal circumstances, in Blu Ray 3D, Treasure of the Four Crowns is good for some laughs and over-the-top 3D mayhem. But then I also feel that way about Friday the 13th Part III in 3-D (actually one of the few films that still entertains at some level in 2D) and Jaws 3D.